Death: The Greatest Teacher

A fellow I went to high school with just died.  We weren’t friends back then, but he was nice to me. I met him at my high school reunion two years ago. He took heaps of photos with his bigass camera. He smiled easily. He seemed genuine. Honest face. We caught up. I had a crush on the girl he dated in high school… but I had a crush on her long before… like in grade 7.

Back in school he was a total headbanger. Fantastic mullet.

Anyway, I’m feeling pretty emotional about this.

***

I carried these feelings of grief with me as I went to the Buzz Club to play a few songs.

My whole set was for Jason. He and I had really reconnected in the last few years.

I am grateful to the time I knew him.

***

On another note, here is a new song that I played tonight. It’s feeling of defiance somehow makes me think of Jason:

fuck around

if you think i’m fucking around
i never fuck around
i don’t fuck around
fuck around yeah

if you think i’m leaving this town
i’ll never leave this town
i don’t leave towns
leave towns yeah

and if you think you’re my dumpin grounds
i’ve never dumped a ground
i don’t dump grounds
dump grounds yeah

and if you think i’m dreamin of sounds
i never dreamed of sounds

if you think i’m dreaming of sounds
if you think i’m fucking around woah

if you think you’re lying through your teeth
i’ll pull out your teeth
and if you wanna start a fuckin war
i got bigger guns
brighter suns and rusty pliers

i dont wanna tease you
wanna please you
as you’re leavin this town

if you think i’m fuckin around woah

and i won’t be frightened
sittin in a chatroom
baby go dry your tears
and i won’t be enlightened
playin pacman
baby i’m past the tears
playin pacman
baby i’m past the tears

if you think i’m leaving this town
the city sucked me down
the city and the towns
make the sounds yeah

and if you wanna freak out the town
freak it up and down
freakin out the town
freak the town yeah

and if you think i’m dreaming of sounds
i never dreamed of sounds

if you think i’m dreaming of sounds
if you think i’m fuckin around woah

and i won’t be frightened
sittin in a chatroom
baby go dry your tears
and i won’t be enlightened
playin pacman
baby i’m past the tears
playin pacman
baby i’m past the tears

if you think i’m fucking around
i never fuck around
i don’t fuck around
fuck around yeah (repeat)

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