So it happened. I was on Das Supertalent.
Cameras galore. Cameras filming me for hours as we sat backstage, schmoozing with the other contestants… going to the bathroom and bumping into Dieter Bohlen (The main judge: from Modern Talking – the quintessential German 80’s pop band). The swanky hotel room with free brunch. The other contestants. The food. The coffee. The microphone constantly recording every word I said every day. The lights. The audience. The huge, 1000 person audience. Dieter. Bruce. Inka.
How did it start? Well, I got an email in my inbox from Anje, who had seen my video and thought I would be a good addition to the talent show.
I went to the first round. I passed. They asked me a few questions. I filled out forms. Of course… plenty of waiting around. As far as I could tell, I was the only contestant doing original material. Others were doing Celine Dion, the Biebs etc… (The usual “mainstream” suspects)
I went directly to the second round. In another building a few hours after the first round. I was filmed by a few cameras. They asked me to do a second song. I did “No Way”. They seemed to like me. They asked a few questions.
The third round took place in Halle. We were put up in a hotel. We went to the studio the next morning after staying up until 3am rehearsing and rehearsing over and over and…
I have to say, I adore hotel breakfast buffets. Adore. Endless food – you can’t beat it.
So, when we arrived at the studio, we were mic’ed up. These mics recorded every word we said pretty much all day. We were asked to sit in a big waiting room with many other contestants. Four bigass cameras were set up, filming us. We spoke at length with a dancing couple. We were speaking English (the guy was from Amurrika) but a woman from the camera crew kept approaching us and asking us to speak in German (which meant I said precious little). We would keep forgetting and slip back into English. Oh well.
There were many hours of waiting. Then there was a lunch break. Then they asked me (because I was peculiar-looking – in my makeup, bald head and crazy outfit) to walk through the crowd. I did. I walked a silly walk and posed for several people who took selfies with me.
Eventually, I was told it was almost my time. I got ready. I had to wait backstage. I listened to the other acts and did stretching excercises.
Eventually, I went on stage. I have to say, I’m rarely nervous before performing, but my knees were knocking. The lights, the giant cameras swooping all over the place, 1500 people in the audience. It was exhilarating, to say the least.
I had planned to do a seamless mash-up of “Shit’s Fucked” and “No Way” with a costume change in between. I had a glittery costume underneath the yellow vest. However, I was caught off guard when Inka buzzed the red X mid-way through Shit’s Fucked. Therefore, I simply jumped right into No Way, sans costume change.
Playing in front of judges can be effing stressful. Especially since one of the judges is an Eighties’ icon (Modern Talking). However, I think it’s good to be in those sorts of intense, pot-boiler situations. You find out what you’re made of.
That being said, when I was done, Bruce came onto the stage, gave me a smooch and put the star around my neck. I’d made it. I made it to the shortlist for the final round.
I made it. I fuckin made it.